Long distance relationships are definitely risky, and if you are unfortunate enough to be far away from a significant other, the prospect of potentially ruining your relationship can seem daunting. Just because long distance relationships are difficult, doesn’t mean they’re impossible. Simple adjustments to your attitude and lifestyle can help you keep your loved one in your life.
Part 1 of 5: Preserving Normalcy
1. Communicate in some way every day, more than once if possible. Since you won’t be seeing each other, it’s important to establish and maintain an emotional connection. These don’t always have to be long, in-depth conversations. Tell each other about your little triumphs and tragedies. Ask on for advice. Use an instant messenger program or VoIP for real-time chat, or web cams for that visual connection. E-mail is great, so make sure you use it, especially if long-distance phone calls put a strain on your budget. Ensure the e-mails are substantive and detailed. It will show that you care enough to put in the time and effort.
2. Work around your schedule. Do your best to maintain communication, even if one of you gets busier than the other. If you are the busy one, warn your partner that you may have limited time, and try to send at least a quick email or text, or a share a brief phone call. If you are the not-as-busy person, take advantage of the time by picking up a new hobby, getting in shape, reading a new book, etc. Flexibility is very important.
3. Visit often. Try to make the time to visit each other as often as possible or as often as your budget permits. A relationship cannot thrive if the only thing you have is the phone call. You need to see each other in person at every opportunity. Visit on a regular schedule if you can; if you can’t, make plans for the next visit as soon as each one ends.
- Create your own rituals around your in-person visits. These can be whatever you choose: eating at a favorite restaurant, enjoying a quiet night together at home, sharing a favorite in-person activity, or anything else.
- Smooth out travel logistics so they don’t get in the way of your time together. Know where to meet at the airport or train station. Learn to travel with one bag or leave basics at your partner’s home to save time at the airport.
- Meet away from home sometimes, too. Go visit a place together that is new to both of you.