You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.
This nonviolent approach to transformation is rooted in love. We do not look at our destructive tendencies as things that must be destroyed (for that would be employing violence in the pursuit of nonviolence) but as confused and hurt parts of ourselves that must be befriended and understood. Love is the nonviolent conqueror, transforming through a mature and loving care, “the care given by the big brother to the little brother.”
The task of the meditator is not to chase away or to suppress the energy of anger that is there but to invite another energy that will be able to care for the anger. ~Thich Nhat Hanh