Your choice to move on emotionally. – Don’t let past relationships and old mistakes ruin your future. Don’t let someone or something that didn’t make it in your life continue to hurt you. If you do, you’re still giving a portion of your life to something that no longer exists – it’s like letting your happiness slip into a black hole. Learn the lesson, release the pain, and move on. Scars remind us of where we have been, not where we are headed. ~Marcandangel
Plenty of women would prefer a phone call over a text from guys they’re dating, yet they don’t realize a very simple method exists to getting less texts and more calls: Don’t text him back.
I know, I know, such a suggestion will strike many as foolish or even insane in our text-addicted society, yet it really all goes back to incentives and human behavior. What we reward, we get more of. When you respond to texts you wish were phone calls, guess what you’ll get? More texts. Less calls.
You’ll also get more time wasters, and less serious contenders in your dating pool. Why? Because not texting men back is the ultimate means of separating those who are really into you from those who are kinda, sorta, maybe-if-it’s-easy interested in you, at least until something better comes along.
Think about it. If a guy who’s really smitten with you texts you and doesn’t get a text back, what will happen? He will pick up the phone and call. It’s the same with you. Let’s say you texted a colleague to confirm a sales meeting you were supposed to attend. If you didn’t hear back, you wouldn’t just shrug it off and forget about it. If it was important to you to get to the meeting to make your pitch, you’d call until you nailed things down. Conversely, let’s say the meeting wasn’t that important, or it conflicted with another, better lead — sure, then maybe you’d let it go.
Same thing with dating. The guy who truly wants to see you, may text initially, but if he doesn’t hear back, he’ll call. Many women fear that if they don’t text back, they’ll lose a guy. And, yes, you will shake off those with lukewarm interest in you, which is a very productive and time-efficient thing to do: You’ve avoided wasting time on and possibly getting hurt by Mr. Maybe.
Too many women think not texting back invites dating mishaps and disasters — but it actually prevents such. Example: An ex-boyfriend of mine, kind of on-again-off-again, was trying to get things “on again” with me, and had set up a dinner date with me by e-mail. The day of the date, he texted me to confirm. I didn’t text back. The date didn’t happen. Disaster — or disaster avoided? Definitely the latter! His lack of interest was why our relationship was always so difficult — or to use the common euphemism, “complicated.” But finally, with non-texting, I was able to put an end to the whole stupid time-wasting nonsense. It’s really, really, not that complicated.
On the other hand, if he’s strongly attracted to you, he’ll give you the benefit of the doubt, make excuses for you — as in “Oh, she’s not a texter” or “Maybe she didn’t get my text.” Indeed, as I’ve seen time and time again in my practice as a dating coach, if a contender is already starting out with a high level of interest in you, not texting back will pique — not dilute — that interest.
This is why the authors of The Rules, Ellen & Sherrie Schneider, encourage women to avoid texting. They rightly point out that if you’re texting back and forth, you’re way too available. There’s no mystery, no distance for him to pursue, if all he has to do it punch a keypad for you to respond.
That said, I know that for many even extremely practiced and disciplined Rules Girls, the “no texting” rule can be one of the most challenging to follow. I hear the complaint all the time: “But we live in a texting world. Everyone texts.”
But the fact that everyone – every girl, to be precise – does text is, perhaps, the strongest case for why YOU should not. After all, Rule #1 is all about “Being a Creature Unlike Any Other.” If every other creature out there is texting – and sexting – on a constant basis, what a simple, elegant way for you to separate yourself from the competition. Take it to the bank, girls: If he really likes you, he WILL call you. No exceptions.
Jag Carrao, Dating and relationship coach
Source:Huffingtonpost
Your man loves you – and doesn’t want to hear certain things from you.
To keep your relationship healthy and happy, stay away from the following phrases. Here are ten things women should never say to their men:
1. “Man up.” This emasculating phrase is never, ever appropriate. He is a man. If he’s not meeting your expectations, learn to communicate this clearly and without insult.
2. “We need to talk.” Yes, you should talk to your man. No, you should not warn him that you need to talk about something yet-to-be-described that will likely be uncomfortable. This phrase is the most likely to shift him into defensive mode. Try a more loving approach and you will surely get better results.
3. “Size doesn’t matter.” If size doesn’t matter, don’t talk about size.
4. “Is she prettier than me?” Related: “Do I look fat in this?” If the question you’re asking him has only one acceptable answer – and if a too-long pause in responding will only feed your insecurities – just trust that his answer would have been the right one and don’t bother to ask it.
5. “You’re just like my ex.” Worse: “I’ve had better.” You don’t want to be compared to his exes, so don’t compare him to yours. Even if he comes out on top, it’s still an awkward comparison.
6. “Are you really that stupid?” Be careful not to use language that emasculates and belittles your guy. Treat him with respect, even when you’re angry or disappointed.
7. “Never mind. I’ll do it myself.” Don’t dismiss the offers of help from your man. A common love language is acts of service. Don’t deny him the opportunity to serve you. Sometimes it’s nice to feel needed.
8. “I can’t live without you.” Use desperate language with caution, and stay clear of phrases that sound clingy in early stages of the relationship. Let him take the lead when it comes to commitment and promises of a future together.
9. “I’m not your mother.” Worse: “I’m just like my mother.” Keep your mom(s) out of it, unless you’re actually talking about patterns learned from your respective families of origin.
10. “Nothing’s wrong.” Yes, it is. He can’t read your mind. If something’s wrong, tell him what’s wrong.
What phrase would you like to banish from the lips of your beloved?
By eHarmony Staff
Beautiful sun rays over Buddhist monks at the graveyard of my little sister, Alanthara. My little brother shot this several hours ago. Today, my five-year-old nephew Kyle, misses his mother so much. He took the snow ball music we bought for his mother home with him. We have one at home, but he would not take it. He wanted the one at his mom’s grave… My mother, father and siblings love my little sister so much. They go visit her almost every day. Before the death of my little sister, a cemetery would be the last place my family would go. But now… all of them are so in love with this place.
As for me, a cemetery is one of the best places in the world. A place where I can be alone, contemplating on the impermanence of life. A place where I can practice detachment and letting go, knowing nothing is permanent in this world. Knowing I cannot take anything with me, not even one penny when I stop breathing. Therefore, why should I chase for something I cannot take…
Jendhamuni
Love is the most healing force in the world; nothing goes deeper than love. It heals not only the body, not only the mind, but also the soul. If one can love then all one´s wounds disappear. Then one becomes whole – and to be whole is to be holy.
Unless one is whole one is not holy. The physical health is a superficial phenomenon. It can happen through medicine, it can happen through science. But the innermost core of one´s being can be healed only through love. Those who know the secret of love know the greatest secret of life. Then there is no misery for them, no old age, no death. Of course the body will become old and the body will die, but love reveals to you the truth that you are not the body. You are pure consciousness, you have no birth, no death. And to live in that pure consciousness is to live in tune with life. Bliss is a by-product of living in tune with life. ~Osho
Happiness and suffering are states of mind, and so their main causes cannot be found outside the mind.
Your hand opens and closes, opens and closes. If it were always a fist or always stretched open, you would be paralysed. Your deepest presence is in every small contracting and expanding, the two as beautifully balanced and coordinated as birds’ wings. ― Rumi
I love elderly so much. When I was a little girl, my grandma taught me to bow, [with my forehead kissing Mother Earth] before every elderly I meet. So, this has been a big thing for me in my life. Back then, while I was playing with my playmates, I would keep my eyes on the street wide open so I would not miss any elderly passing by. From far a way, as soon as I saw them, I would run super fast just to bow before them. I would not leave any of them till they say, ‘May you live up to 100 years old’. Beautiful moment in my life. I still remember this vividly. ~Jendhamuni

The son of my little sister who passed a way 9 months ago. He’s such a tough boy. He’s wearing a picture of his mom, my mother gave him. His lips are dark because he just had a blue ice cream. His name is Kyle, but my little sis called him Boo-Boo, so we all call him Boo-Boo. Kyle is 5 years old. His mother died one week after his birthday. ~Jendhamuni
Knowledge and action should be one. Words and actions are two exterior manifestations of our inner thoughts; but most people’s words exceed their actions.
Being concerned with gain and lossbrings us the feelings of happiness and sadness. We should transcend the concepts of good and evil, gain and loss.
Most people pursue fame and fortune, but think of how much there is in nature that you own already. The stars, the moon, mountains, rivers, flowers, and trees all for you!
Coming to understand the big questions in life has to be done by oneself, no one else can do it for you. Maintaining other people’s ideas is like the mimicry of a parrot – it may be speaking, but it doesn’t know what it’s saying.
Movement was originally easy, but we have been shackled by so many worldly rules and restrictions that it is sometimes difficult to take even a single step.
The truth of things does not reside in some unreachable, distant place: it is in our minds.
You don’t need to travel to some illusory world to find the principles of life: just pay attention to the details of life and experience them. When you begin to doubt, an answer is most likely found where the question begins.
He who is the master of himself does not change through influence from his surroundings or from others.
Author: Tsai Chih Chung, Brian Bruya